"Shake It Out!"

Regrets collect like old friends

Here to relive your darkest moments

I can see no way, I can see no way

And all of the ghouls come out to play

And every demon wants his pound of flesh

But I like to keep some things to myself

I like to keep my issues strong

It's always darkest before the dawn


And I've been a fool and I've been blind
I can never leave the past behind
I can see no way, I can see no way
I'm always dragging that horse around

All of these questions, such a mournful sound
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground
So I like to keep my issues strong
But it's always darkest before the dawn

Shake it up, shake it out, shake it up, shake it out, ooh woaaah
Shake it up, shake it out, shake it up, shake it out, ooh woaaaah

And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off, oh woah

I am done with my graceless heart
So tonight I'm gonna cut it out and then restart
Cause I like to keep my issues strong
It's always darkest before the dawn

Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah
Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah


And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off, oh woah

And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
And given half the chance would I take any of it back
It's a fine romance but it's left me so undone
It's always darkest before the dawn


And I'm damned if I do and I'm damned if I don't
So here's to drinks in the dark at the end of my road
And I'm ready to suffer and I'm ready to hope
It's a shot in the dark and right at my throat

Cause looking for heaven, for the devil in me
Looking for heaven, for the devil in me
Well what the hell I'm gonna let it happen to me

Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah
Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah


And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off, oh woah


Throughout my blog, I use music and the lyrics from some of my favourite songs to get my feelings across.  This song in particular, I really relate to.  I've had to "Shake out" some of my regrets and anxiety - and still am.  I think we all do to a point.  Each and every one of us has done something in our pasts that have somehow affected our future.  I will ALWAYS take responsibility for how I got obese.  I was in a horrible relationship that was abusive in every way.  I let it control me and I turned to food when I was sad or upset.  I still do that from time to time, but it no longer rules me.  The next step for me now is to shake out this anxiety I've had ever since my Mom died.  In two days it will be three years that she has been gone - I have not felt great this week and I'm pretty sure that is why.  Of course I miss her - more than words can say - I wish she was here with us - and she is in her own way.  Grief is a pretty remarkable thing.  One minute I feel so strong, that I feel I can conquer anything...then the next moment, I'm crying in my bed in the fetal position.  I know that in time, the anxiety will shake itself out and I will start to feel better again - it has already started.


I love you Mamma....Hope Heaven is treating you well... XOXOXOXOXO


I had a pretty good week with my fitness and nutrition.  On Tuesday, I was already down eight pounds - almost lost all of the water-weight!  By my weigh-in day on Friday, I had lost a total of seven pounds.  Seven pounds in one week!  Heck yes...I will take it and RUN!!  I worked out hard again - only took Wednesday off because of my lap-band meeting.  The only thing that lacked a bit was my strength training.  I will go hard on Wednesday evening :-)
It is freakin cold here today too - and it is not supposed to let up until Friday.  All week long it is supposed to only be a high of minus 20 for each day pretty much.  As much as I know this is Calgary, and this is the way it is...it still sucks.  It will be nice when a chinook rolls around by Friday. 


Stay warm (or cool if you live in a warm climate) and have a good week everyone!