"YOU Don't Do Yoga!"

So...


We had our Health and Wellness Fair at work this past Thursday.  They had a lot of very informative booths - everything from the Arthritis Society, to World Health, to Survivor Bootcamp...and...The Yoga Studio...


For those of you that don't know, I LOVE Yoga.  I try and do it every Sunday when the opportunity arises.  It's been only since the start of this year that I have taken on a real interest in it.  This summer, I even tried hot yoga.  I am by no means an Ashtanga guru, but I do love the restorative classes.  I love the great stretch that I get and how relaxed it makes me feel. 


This story is going somewhere...lol


I approached The Yoga Studio booth and was grinning ear to ear - I said "Ooooohhhh!!  YOGA!  The guy at the booth looks me up and down and says "YOU don't do yoga!"  to which my reply was "Oh yes I do...I take a class down at Yoga Santosha."  I then proceeded to show him my old ID card with my big fat face on the front of it.  "This USED to be me." I said.  Not suprisingly, the guy wanted to give me his card and give me 50% a class.  I told him to keep his card.  I was shocked...and then the shock quickly turned to anger.  How could he be so rude like that???  You would think that someone in the fitness industry wouldn't treat people like that.  What I need to realize is that those kinds of people are everywhere - and I clearly need to figure out a way to not let them get to me.  I have been working WAY too hard to let some small-minded person rent space in my head like that. 


So ya...The Yoga Studio won't be getting my business anytime soon...or ever...


It was a pretty hard week for me.  I was sick to my stomach after spin class - which I found was kind of strange - I did push myself, but have pushed harded before.  I think it was mainly due to a mild stomach flu which I woke up to on Tuesday.  I took Wednesday off and rested - I needed it.  I ended up taking Friday, and today off too.  It was kind of nice actually.


We went to the movies last night and saw Crazy Stupid Love and Contagion.  Both movies were great and it was nice to get out of the house for an evening. 


I am looking forward to this week and I am looking forward to my fill appointment on Friday.  I am finding that my hunger is coming back a little more quickly after I have eaten than I would like.  I am hoping we can nip that in the bud.


Have a good week everyone!


K

My Journey WILL Continue!

I am very happy to report that I managed to break through my crappy attitude "funk" that I was in last week with regards to my emotional eating - and am down five pounds.  How did I do it?  Thinking back through the week, all I did was break it down day by day and tackled it that way.  I still had some issues in regards to some anxiety, but I didn't waver from my nutrition plan.  I also exercised my butt off -had wicked hard heavy lifting workouts with Ben, and lots of cardio and TRX awesomeness in bootcamp with Kendra - I also did another hot yoga class on Wednesday and loved it yet again.  I stayed active six times this week - with today being my only day off...and I feel great!

One item that has been on my mind for a while now is the fact that my trainer Ben is moving away.  I have never come out and told him how I  feel, as making a big deal out of it would be downright counter-productive.  When he first told me, I was anxiety ridden...I kept asking myself these same questions...How would I continue with my journey?  How will I actually do this?  Will I give up and just be fat again?  He has been training me ever since I started - I want him to finish it with me...how will that happen?  I have answered these questions recently - I WILL continue this journey on my own and I CAN do it.  I have come so far - too far to just give up.  I have WAY more self-reliance than I did even a year ago.   The time has come to do "this" on my own.  As for him being a part of my journey right to the end - he still will be there - just not in person...oh the wonders of email/facebook/skype! 

I will miss Ben and Holly VERY much - they have done so much for me and words cannot express how much that means to me.  It's not very often that really great/caring people come into your life - they came into my life at that time for a reason - they have guided me and encouraged me and pushed me to the point in my life where I am stronger than I have ever been - and that's just not the physical - I'm stronger mentally and am in such a better place than I was two years ago. 

Regardless...I will be okay - I know I will...Ben has given me the "tools" that I need to push through to this next phase of my journey...all I need to do and will do is work as hard as I can...and make myself happy...I believe things happen for a reason - I am excited at what I am going to accomplish...

Look out...HERE I COME.

Commitment

com·mit·ment  [kuh-mit-muhnt]


–noun


1. the act of committing.


2. the state of being committed.


3. the act of committing, pledging, or engaging oneself.

What exactly is commitment??  When I read through these three definitions, I stop at number 2 and giggle...number one seems pretty close to the way I see it, but number three is where I would truly like to be.  I know that in order for my weight loss journey to be successful, I must commit to myself a whole lot more.  Back in January when I started my pre op diet I was hugely commited to myself...in the past week, not so much.  I found myself making some wrong food choices, and my exercise was WAY down.  This was the first time in almost two years that I actually didn't feel like working out.  I started off the week with an awesome hot yoga class - for those of you that have never tried hot yoga before, I would definitely encourage you to try it.  I must warn everyone tho - you will sweat like you have never sweat before...it didn't just drip out of me...it POURED and ROLLED out of me...lol  At first, I was really nervous - worried I wouldn't be able to stay in the room for more than 5 minutes...but once the class started, I was commited.  It ended up being their hardest class too - but my friend Randi and I did it!  It was also great for my joints - I was shocked by the amount that I could do - I could move the way I wanted without limits and pain.  It was just a great experience for me overall - something I will definitely try again.  I did Kendra's bootcamps also, but the rest of the time I just didn't do anything...it felt weird and I didn't like it. 

This was the first week ever that I felt as though I was failing at this...by saying this, I mean this whole journey that I have been working hard on.  I feel lost...and I feel alone.  I know that nobody can lose this weight for me and I know that nobody else can make me happy but me.  Every week lately seems like a broken record...same things going through my head...then me telling myself that I must make that commitment to myself and start doing this for me.  I am afraid at failing and letting myself down...undoing all of my hard work.  I just keep telling myself if I could just get a hold on my "head stuff" that I'm golden...I've got this...

Starting right now - I am going to make a commitment to myself.  I will no longer make shitty food choices...I will figure out what I need to do to get in some form of activity every day.  Even if it is just going out for a walk in the evening...I will commit to stop the negative self talk and worrying about failing all the time.  Everyone has a "blip" in their journey and I am finally figuring out that this is my "blip." 

What are you doing to stay commited to yourself?  Are you commited enough to want to succeed?  How badly do you want this?  Are you willing to do anything to reach your goals?  These are all the questions I am asking myself once again...I DO want this...I AM commited and I am willing to do whatever it takes to get my weight loss on the move again.

And lastly..."Don't think about it...DO it."  Something that my trainer Ben has told me over and over and over...

So this week...I'm gonna DO it!