Showing posts with label roller coaster. Show all posts
Showing posts with label roller coaster. Show all posts

Sunday, July 3, 2011

I Am Human

Ummmm...yeah...it's certainly been an interesting week to say the least - an emotional roller coaster of sorts actually, and I've not been very happy about riding it out.  Monday started off super-great for me.  I received the news that I had gotten the job that I applied for.  I will be back working at the DSC - the Diagnostic and Scientific Centre for Calgary Laboratory Services.  I have been wanting this change for quite some time.  While I will miss my co-workers at the Rockyview, I know I will be much happier doing a job that I love.  I have no exact date when I will be moving over there - hopefully there won't be too much of a hold-up.

The rest of the week was stressful...and I can't just pin-point one reason why.  It was a multitude of things.  The way I dealt with it blew sucked (to put it mildly).   I started my cycle again of emotional eating again.  I haven't done this in probably over a year now.  While I was a bit surprised at what I had done, I was immediately upset with myself - but I kept doing it!  My food of choice was of course sugar...I get that instant calmness come over me immediately after putting it in my mouth - but of course within an hour of consuming it, I just wanted to make myself throw up.  Since my surgery, I have had a few people come up to me and tell me I took the easy way out - that I should be able to do this with just diet and exercise alone.  The lap-band by NO means is a quick fix...I knew this going in and I still believe that.  It is only a TOOL and will work for me as long as I am working with it.  This means NO ice-cream...NO chocolate...NO cereal in the evenings! 

I think what is different about me this time around with this cycle of my emotional eating, is that I have realized that I AM human...I will slip up like this from time to time...and the only thing I can and WILL do is to get back on track and get back into my routine.  I have come WAY too far to screw this up.  I will start again to use my lap-band as a tool and try to remember some of the tools I was taught in my weight loss support group:  Am I head hungry, stomach hungry or heart hungry?  Lately I've noticed I've had a heck a lof of heart hunger and need to THINK before I eat. 

Anyone else out there find that they emotionally eat?  I would love to hear the strategies you use to combat it...

It is a constant battle for me...but I'm human and I will kick it!