Struggling

It's back.

My insomnia is back.

It's been back since the second last week in January, and frankly...it's driving me CRAZY.

I went to my doctor about it after two days in a row of basically no sleep. I asked him to let me go back on the Seroquel - even if it was just a really low dose.

He said absolutely not.

Then he wrote me a prescription for Immovane (to use only in emergencies) and sent me on my way.  He told me all I needed was to get my sleep cycle back in sync. 

That was just over two weeks ago.  Yes, it has gotten better marginally...but last night, I went back to a sleepless night after a stressful time at work yesterday.

Why do I do this to myself?!  I know better than to bring work home with me! 

On the upside, at least I am mostly keeping up with my exercise program - going to the gym four times a week. My nutrition is lacking though.  I'm starting to emotionally eat again and that's not good.

I know better.

I  WILL get back on track.  I WILL NOT let the anxiety consume me like it did a few years back.  I am bigger than it, and I know only I can control how I act and feel.

I just need to have patience with myself...yes...patience.

I can do this.